I’m a millennial mom…Welcome to my world.
When you were growing up, did you ever imagine that, if and when you had kids you would sleep less than when you were a late teen to early twenty-something fresh home from a college party? Did you think that you would choose to live the life of a busy body AFTER you had children? I sure didn’t. Now, I know that my life isn’t particularly normal or even the same as the average mom but I really had no idea.
I have two children who are a few years apart from each other. Both of them are boys. They are wild and they are full-on 110% pure boy. They like to break things on purpose, play video games, fight with each other, beat up their stuffed animals in a wrestling match, and have mock battles between Batman and 50 tiny army men. They get along most of the time and sometimes they have to be put into time-out to give them a chance to chill out. They don’t get separated because that would be too easy. They have to stand next to each other, probably about 3 feet apart facing the wall. They cannot speak to anyone, including each other, and they cannot touch each other. They hate it. Needless to say, it’s very effective and the argument is left behind quite quickly and apologies between them are fast but sincere. They like to stay up later than most kids if they can get away with it because they know that they don’t have to get on a school bus at the crack of dawn. And, on occasion, they have those nights where they just can’t seem to fall asleep and are up and down out of the bed looking for a snack or a quick drink or a trip to the bathroom. Anything to delay settling down for sleep.
I work a full-time job, outside of the home, and I also work from inside the home. I have some side project endeavors that I work on, but they are only part-time. I also have this, my blog. Add to those the fact that I cook, clean, and homeschool my children. I do my best to cook at least 5 nights out of the week. I rarely like to order out for anything but on occasion will indulge my children’s love for pizza or my love for Chinese food. When I cook, 95% of the time, I cook a full meal, you know, meat, green vegetable, starch. I have been blessed with children who are picky but will eat green vegetables without any issue and actually clear their own plates. We try to eat dinner together at least 4 nights out of the week, whether it's a night I cook or when it's just a pizza night. Time spent together as a family is crucial. With working a full-time job, I am gone a lot of the time. Then, since I homeschool, I am spending time with one a little more than the other due to what he is learning and the fact that the other is just getting ready to start. Part of their homeschool is handled by their grandmother. She takes over after I go to work to implement the school work or lesson I have already set for them for that day. Once I come home from work, I check over school work and file it away and get ready to cook dinner. After dinner, we have a little more time together and then they are free to play for some time before bed and their father and I go into our office for work. Sometimes we are working on something together and other times we have our own things to take care of but usually, it's both. In that time, we stop for chit chat or working out plans for something or we may a question for each other or simply just need to have a normal, non-work conversation, and we always stop to tuck our babies in. We end up in the office quite late usually.
By the time we get to bed, its anywhere between 3 am and 5 am on average. Right now, for example, it is a few minutes shy of 4 am. Dinner has since been served and cleaned up, we watched a movie with the boys, they have been tucked in for quite some time now, and we have already finished at least 3 hours of work already. Once I finish, we will take some time for ourselves to sit together and relax and listen to a podcast or some music or maybe look at a tv show or a documentary. It will probably be 5 am before we finally retire to bed. I will most likely be back out of bed around 8 am or 9 am, unless on the rare chance that the boys have come to climb into bed with me and will stay there until around 10 am… Either way, I don’t have to get up for work in the morning so sleeping in is a possibility. Then it will be a full day of homeschool work, outside time, dentist appointments, and errands for me to run to pay a bill…then of course, dinner and work in my office. It’s a cycle that only varies slightly on a day to day basis. As parents, we try to stay close to home as much as we can and not leave our boys with just anyone so that we can go out and have a good time. Even though we are in the office working, our boys can always get to us. They don’t have to ask permission to come in and speak to us or ask us something. Even if it’s as simple as something they did in a video game. We are always here for our boys. Besides, we are young and we know that they will not stay little boys forever so we take advantage of the time we have because once they are older, they will have their own lives that do not include coming into the office just to give mommy or daddy a hug. I want to get as many of those hugs as I can before they go away.
Sure, we like to go out every now and then, we aren’t hermits. I have been asked more than a few times why we don’t just get a babysitter and go out. To be honest, we have people who are very willing to watch our boys for an entire night if we want them to, but we don’t. It’s not something we have done more than a couple of times since our children came into this world. Some of the times that we have done it, we ended up taking them to the sitter and coming home. The house was too quiet at that point and we either stayed up all night working on whatever and picking the boys up super early in the morning or, we ended up going to get them from the sitter within a few hours. We do have to go out of town on occasion for a few days at a time for one thing or another that we cannot take them with us. This is never easy for us. No matter how busy we are while we are out of town, we are always wishing they were there with us. We usually will see something that they would like and make a mental note to come back with them. We have quite the list at this point.
Sure, I have always lived my life set on “GO” and always have to be doing something but I really had no idea. No, I don’t sleep a lot and many people I know wonder how I am standing and awake enough to function on a daily basis. I take my off days, believe me. I still cook and do necessary things but I don’t do work or anything that can be done another day. Sure, I have moments where I wish I could get out more and go have some fun with friends but at the same time, I am home and if I want to have some fun, I can go play video games with my boys. They love beating me at whatever game it is that we are playing, hahaha. I had no idea what I was in for when I had my first child and I really didn’t know what was about to happen when I had my second child. It took a couple of years to get a schedule and a routine down once they were both here but we have a pretty solid system. No, things are not always exactly the same, we aren’t boring people, but everything functions as it should and usually stays on track. A piece of advice I could give to new moms, do the research and get an idea of what you want your life to be like and then trash it. You really have no idea what to expect until it happens when it comes to juggling work, children, marriage, and everything else, but don’t worry, you will get the hang of it. You will find your “groove” and things will be just peachy. Some days will be harder than others and some days you will see how worth it the rough days were. Suck it up buttercup, you’re a mom and no matter what happens in life, your children will always need you for one thing or another so take advantage and enjoy the simpler things in life. Enjoy your children as much as you can before they leave your home and always be ready for anything!